January 20, 2009 - need I say more?

As all of you know, today is the day that Barack Hussein Obama was inaugurated as the 44th President of the United States of America.

I can't believe this...any of it...this euphoria I've felt all day even knowing that tomorrow I'll still have all the homework I put off today.

I worry every day...constantly...

but for today...for this one day, I didn't worry. I felt hopeful.

As I watched Obama give his inaugural address with the hundreds of thousands of flags waving in the air, I felt awestruck...so much so that it brought me to tears.

It's amazing how far we've come in this country.

Yes, we have problems. Major problems.

We're stuck in a war going nowhere, and we're suffering through the worst recession in years.

But somehow I have faith that we'll pull through.

I believe that with Obama's guidance, we will get out of this darkness.

This is the nation that won its independence againt the more armed and prepared opponent.

This is the country that fought each other, brother against brother, and managed to come back together again.

This is the America that overcame the storms of Pearl Harbor and 9/11.

We are a nation of strong individuals that collectively make up one resounding will to persevere.

The election of Obama is not only an historic moment because of his ethnicity and his promises; it is an historic event that proves that, as it did during WWII and 9/11, America bound together with one voice to vote him into office.

So, when you watch any of the inaugural celebrations, know that we did this. We made it happen. Not some corporate America, not some political right-wings, not some extreme religious group, not even Obama himself.

We all did it. Together.

I believe it's safe to say that we truly are one right now.

Times...they are a changing...

Hey, Everyone, what's happening?

I haven't written up here in forever. I'm sorry if you missed me. :-p

Life is progressing pretty well for me as of late. I've got one more semester at Wilson Tech, and then I'm through there! :-) My last semester actually starts this Thursday. I'm extremely excited, but I'm also kinda scared.

You ever look at yourself in the mirror and go, "Jesus Christ, I'm an adult!" ? It's a scary feeling. It seems like just the other day I was playing with action figures and stuffed animals with David, and now I'm trying to figure out my life plans...and those life plans are only a few months away.

It's frightening...becoming an adult.

I've decided to save my pay check for the next few months so I can hopefully afford an apartment wherever I move. I'm planning to work extra over the summer. I'd love to get a job at a clothing store. That way, I could get discounts on clothes...because once I move, I won't have much extra money for anything. :-p

I'm happy to be this age, but sometimes, I wish I could regress to an early year in my life.

Life was simple even though it was difficult, if that makes any sense.

All I had to worry about was school and my action figures and The Animal Cafe.

Now I'm 21, and I'm worrying about what apartments I'll be able to afford and if I can make it through medical school.

I wish I could go back to '97 or so. That would be nice. I was ten! Can you believe that?

Sometimes I can't help but think about those times...my aunt would drive David and me to school from my grandparents' house; I'd go to school and work my ass off; my aunt would pick us up; we'd go by Bojangle's or McDonald's right after school, and then my aunt would take me to my grandparent's house because my mom would still be in Wilson teaching. Grandma would play the tv too loud while I was trying to do my homework, and Grandpa would be doing the same...just in his room. They'd both later have dinner together in complete silence, and their chewing noises would drive me crazy. :-p

Then my mom would come over and take me home and help me study. I'd go to bed around 12 or 1 usually. Then it was a repeat.

It was a little difficult for a kid. I think my school worked us harder than some, but it was the norm. It was my schedule.

Now my aunt and grandparents are gone, and the old house is just a ghost now.

Growing up is so hard. You have to lose so many people you thought would always be there for you. You never really forget them or replace them. You just find little ways to make things better for yourself.

I suppose that's how life is. You live, love, and lose.

*sigh*

This may sound really negative, but I'm honestly not in a bad mood. I'm just feeling reflective. Actually, I'm in kind of a good mood for some reason.

Don't laugh at me, but I just did a little bit of meditation, and it felt really nice. It's a great feeling to just cleanse your thoughts for a little while...I think I'll do that more often.

Anyway, I just thought I'd grace you guys with another blog entry.

Happy 2009, Everyone! I hope it brings everyone happiness, and I hope it brings me new experiences and new memories to add to my old ones. :-)

Oh, the sleepless nights and torturous mornings...

Okay, perhaps I'm being a bit dramatic here, but ever since classes have started back, I've felt soooo stressed, and it seems I never have any time anymore to just be. not be a student. not be a perfectionist. Just be.

But this feeling is nothing new to me, though. I've felt this way ever since the second grade.

Why do I say second grade? Why don't I say first grade?Well, because in the first grade, I still worked my mini-ass off, but I wasn't preoccupied with getting straight A's. Well, I won't say that, actually, because when I got a B in penmanship, I worked extra hard at my damn cursive so my teacher would give me an A! hehe

But what I mean is that it wasn't life or death to me. It was just either really good or really bad.

Then I won the scholastic achievement award for having the highest grade in my class in the first grade. I think this is where everything change for me. I think that at seven years of age, I realized that my life was going to be based upon not merely succeeding but excelling.

Since then, I have always worked my hardest, tortured myself over my work, and I've usually reaped the benefits.

But I continuously worry - what am I going to do if I don't make an A one day? And this is bound to happen! I am human; I am not infallible, though I'd like to think myself so. How can I handle not excelling...how can I handle simply achieving?

I say all this because I'm quite stressed about two of my classes this semester - Anatomy and Physiology and Pre-Calculus Trigonometry. What if these two classes ruin my excelling? Can I handle that?

*sigh*

I guess the only thing I can do is attempt to continue to excel and see what happens.

Anyway, this is not really a cohesive blog nor a detailed one. I just felt like writing my anxieties out, and this seemed to be as good a place as any. :-p

Critique?

I realize I didn't mention this in my introductory blog, but I intend to make this site a place for me to talk about anything...that entails everything from my life, my dreams, my cats, movies, music, plays, etc.

So, for my first real post, as I suppose one would call this, I think I'll take a few moments to review some movies I've seen recently.

In the last few months, I have become a subscriber to one of God's greatest gifts to earth. That's right, Ladies and Gentlemen; I'm talking about Netflix. Netflix has allowed me to see so many movies I've been dying to view but haven't had the money to buy. For the people who know me, I'm not usually a rent-your-movie type of girl. I usually buy my movies, but Netflix lets me order the movies I'd like to see online. Then, if I want to buy them, I'll do so, and if not, well, that's some money saved, right?

Anyway, I think I'll use this blog to, among other things, review movies I've recently received from my queue. Not all of these movies are new. In fact, some of them are quite old, but I still feel like reviewing them, so deal with it, mmkay? :-p

Exodus (1960)

This is a movie that my mother requested I put on my queue. We'd recently watched Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, which we both loved, and since Paul Newman (Cassidy) plays in this epic story of the creation of the nation of Israel, we were both eager to take a gander at this classic film, and we were not disappointed.

Paul Newman stars as Ari Ben Canaan, a young man who is determined to help rescue the Jewish refugees from Europe, who are being held in Cyprus. Newman and a cast of other admirable Israeli-born Jews team together to take these refugees to Israel, which, at this time, is not yet a recognized nation.

Newman and his crew succeed, but getting there is only half the trouble. When the refugees arrive in Israel, they are faced with British occupation and Palestinian neighbors who are not pleased that both the refugees and the Israeli-born Jews are fighting for a nation of their own.

Given that the film was released in 1960, a lot of the non-lead actors can be a bit dry, but Paul Newman most certainly makes up for this with his sharp yet smooth acting chops. Eva Marie Saint co-stars as the gentile woman who falls for Newman's character. Like the non-lead actors, her character is a bit dry, but her beauty and angelic presence gives the film a light lift at times. At the same time, her character is central in showing the audience that the problems in Israel and in the world are not just the problems of the specific people in that area. The responsibility belongs to all of us to make ourselves knowledgeable of what is occurring outside our comfortable living rooms.

Another actor who makes this film great is Sal Mineo who plays a young survivor of the Holocaust. Because of his experiences, he has become bitter toward all non-Jews and wishes to help the Israeli cause in any way possible, despite the risks. The entire movie is filled with moving moments, but there is one scene in particular in which Sal's character recounts his experience at a concentration camp, that is most haunting.

There is really only one particular aspect of the movie which I did not enjoy. There is about a thirty minute diversion from the plot involving Ben Canaan's uncle being imprisoned, which I found a little redundant. While I like the underlying story line about the uncle being caught by the British and imprisoned, I think the director should have cut his escape from prison down considerably, for it wasn't really a very necessary part of the plot.

Other than that, I thought this was an excellent movie with an excellent message. Paul Newman's speech at the end will give you chills. Even the music will win you over.

Filled with heart-wrenching moments, this movie is not only about the creation of the state of Israel. It is about brotherhood and peace in a time of unending chaos.

I give it a 5 out of 5 stars.

I'm Not There (2007)

Where do I begin with this film? I rented it from Netflix mainly because of Heath Ledger, whom I've always adored, and because of Cate Blanchett, whom I really wanted to see play a man. To my dismay, I was sadly disappointed in the quality and quantity of the film itself.

I'm Not There is a two hour and fifteen minute film about the life and recordings of Bob Dylan. A myriad of actors portray the Dylan-like characters with very different plots woven together very oddly and out of place.

The first story told to us is that of Heath Ledger's character Robbie. Robbie is an actor playing the part in a movie version of the life of a famous musician (played by Christian Bale). Robbie meets a French artist on the set of the biopic, falls in love with her, and ends up marrying her. Throughout the film, the camera returns to Ledger's storyline as we see Robbie's marriage failing and the actor losing custody of his children.

Bale's character comes in awkwardly. We see him speaking at a banquet. It is here that he makes the mistake of saying that he shares some of the same feelings that Lee Harvey Oswald had. Booted out of the banquet, he becomes unpopular with many. Jack (Bale) becomes a recluse and almost disappears entirely from the public's eye. His story is told as a documentary with Julianne Moore playing the main narrator in his story.

Along with Bale's story comes the tale of a young black boy by the name of Woody. Woody (played by Marcus Carl Franklin) is a delinquent who jumps trains and dreams of becoming a famous folk singer.

Of all the amazing acting in this movie, I think perhaps Cate Blanchett's is the most outstanding. She plays a famous folk singer by the name of Jude who is battling with stardom and staying true to what he really believes in...not to mention a drug problem. Blanchett's acting is so unique and so original in this part. It is a shame that she did not receive the Oscar for this role. Her character's attitude is rebellious, yet his soul is searching for peace in between rebellion and fame. He wishes to retain the originality that he once had; he feels he is betraying that which he once stood for. At the same time, he believes that people think his rebellious nature to be expected of him, and he does not wish to submit to the will of others.

Finally, Richard Gere plays a middle-aged Billy the Kid who finds himself living in the mountains as a hide-away. His tale weaves perhaps the most ridiculous story of them all. Living in the mountains, his small mountain town and home are to be destroyed. At a town meeting, which includes a number of giraffes, ostriches, people with face paint, and a dead girl, Billy speaks up on behalf of his fellow neighbors only to be arrested. He breaks free, and the last time we see him he is in a train on his way to nowhere.

I respect this movie for its acting, but I did not like the plot (if you can call it a plot at all). Admittedly, I am not, nor have I ever been, a Bob Dylan fan, so you'll have to take this review with a grain of salt. I, a non-Bob Dylan fan, did not enjoy this movie. I feel this film could be more appreciated by those who know Bob Dylan's materials and enjoy his music. Perhaps the symbolism would make more sense.

I understand this film makes a parallel between Dylan and his music. All of the characters represent pieces of Bob Dylan and his songs. Dylan is all of those people, yet he is none of them. He is all of their ideals, yet he believes nothing. I understand the point. I just didn't like the way it was delivered.

Again, the acting was amazing, especially Blanchett's, Ledger's, and Bale's, but the plot was too abstract for my taste. Some of the scenes were odd. The dialogue grew stiff and boring at times, and did I mention Bale has an afro and sings a song about Jesus for about ten minutes?

Overall, it was too long, too wordy, and too self-righteous for its own sake.

I give it a 2 out of 5 stars.

Well, that's all for now. I'll post more later!! I hope you'll enjoy them! :-)

Pleased to Meet You...Hope You Guess My Name...

Hello, Ladies and Gentlemen of the interweb, how are you?

Since this is my first post up here, I guess I'll tell you guys a little bit about myself...but not too much. :-p

My name's Mary. I'm 20. I go to Wilson CC right now, and I will be transferring to my senior institution exactly a year from now, so I'm very excited about that. Education's always been the most important part of my life, so I'm a bit of a nerd.

Also, I'm dating and have been dating a fellow by the name of Mario Espinoza for almost three years now, and I'm very happy with our relationship. We're more than boyfriend/girlfriend. We're best friends, and I've always thought that to be THE most important element of a good relationship - continued friendship.

Umm, besides that, there's not too much to me, I suppose. I love movies, books, music, friends, family, etc.

So I suppose that will be all for my first post. This post is short, and for me, that's pretty rare, but I didn't want to bore you with an introduction about myself because the other blogs I write will most likely be much longer than this one. Anyway...yeah...it's nice to meet all of you, and I shall look forward to reading your blogs and writing some of my own!! :-)